10/8/12

Change is essential

Change.
It’s such a difficult thing for me.
I love routines, I love patterns, I love when things stay the same.
But change is essential.
It happens whether we like it or not.
I look at all the people that have come in and out of my life and it’s CRAZY!
People that I never thought I’d be friends with I was best friends with.
People I always thought I’d be best friends with I rarely even talk to now.
I look at all the fun memories and I realize that is all they are… just a memory, just a picture on Facebook.
Change makes me sad. 
I miss it. I miss all the laughs. I miss how simple it was to make friends in high school. I miss being around people I am familiar with.
My group of friends has changed so much since even just the start of sophomore year, and I met so many new wonderful people by the end of senior year.
I wish someone had told me not to worry so much about drama in high school.
Once you graduate, it’s over. You don’t have to see people you don’t want to.
If they had a good impression on you, you can see them as often as you like, which is so great!
Everyone is thrown into new schools, with new challenges, new friends, NEW NEW NEW.
I wish I hadn’t worried so much in high school.
 I feel like I wasted a TON of time trying to be there for people who didn’t want me there anyways.
It seriously makes me want to cry.
But I don’t regret anything!
Growing up just makes me realize that the people that stick around are the ones that want to be in your life.
Today, I got texts from 4 people who I rarely talk to.
I can’t tell you how happy it made me that they took the time out of their day to see how I was doing!
I love it. I love reminiscing. I love catching up. I love hearing about new things that happen.

But I can’t tell you how wonderful it is to have that one person by your side, through thick and thin, through good and bad. Hunter Hoopes is my rock.
He keeps me stable, he keeps me grateful, he keeps me hopeful.
I can’t even explain how much he has helped me change, and grow into the type of person I want to be.
He is SO understand and so patient with me.
He listens to me when I cry, he listens to me rant and scream and complain.
Basically, he’s ALWAYS there for me.
I don’t regret the decisions I’ve made when it comes to him!
I am so glad I said yes when he asked me out.
I am so glad I stuck with him before we started dating.
We had a pretty rocky few months before he asked me out.
I was constantly confused and constantly hurting!
But it was SO worth it.
After the day he asked me out, everything changed!
Nothing was confusing, nothing hurt.
It was and has been pure bliss:)
Hunter has been my best friend for almost 2 years now, and let me tell you, it’s been the greatest time of my life.
I’ve learned not to care about what people say about us.
I don’t care about how difficult things can be.
I didn’t listen when people said that I shouldn’t be in a relationship with him.
And I am so grateful that I didn’t listen to those doubters.
We have seriously the BEST relationship.
We make a perfect pair.
He is my other half.
I adore his family too.
Whether they know it or not, I seriously love them all.
They make me feel so happy when I'm around them.
My heart melts when Hunter's youngest brother gives me a hug.
When his mom tells me she loves me, I can't help but feel so warm and happy inside!
I love all of his little baby cousins, they make me smile and appreciate life and happiness.
My family absolutely ADORES him too, but who wouldn't?
He's so perfect for me<3

And I’ve found a few friends that understand that.
They never ask me to decide between them and him and they understand how I feel .
It’s so refreshing to not have to try to be different or hide my feelings.
Since graduation, I have talked to so many different people who I never thought I’d be friends with.
This kind of change is GOOD.
It’s GREAT, actually.
I’ve met some wonderful people that have helped me in so many ways!
I want to cry because they are so great!
I love how supportive these new friends I have made are.
I miss my high school friends so much… and it’s sad how often I feel like they forget me.
And how often I feel like no matter how hard I try, it will just never be the same.
But I’m still determined to try.
The Lord has seriously blessed me! I have such wonderful people in my life.
I love all the growth I’ve experienced these past few months.
I’m focusing on me and bettering myself and it’s GREAT.
I don’t feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders anymore.
I’ve learned to be more accepting and let people make their own decisions.
I’ve learned to love sooo much.
I’ve learned to accept change!
I love my little sister, Ashley! I feel like we’ve gotten so much closer after I moved to college.
I love when I get to spend time with her shopping or watching the Chargers games.
I realize that my parents aren’t perfect, but they are my parents!
They have done so much for me and I truly am grateful.
Sometimes I can’t stand the fact that I moved away, but other times, I am so grateful I did.
My relationships with the people that matter have only gotten stronger!


College is a HUGE change.
 It’s one of the biggest changes I have ever had to go through.
And let me tell you, this adjustment has not been easy,
 it still isn’t! 
But each day, I learn to accept more, learn more, and grow more.
I can’t wait to see how much I grow as a person in the next few years!

This is just me rambling a lot about things that are on my mind.
I miss the older memories, but I'm excited to make new ones!
I am so grateful for all of the blessings the Lord has given me.
<3
Thank you all for being part of my life!